Monster (Left), Red Bull (Center), AMP (right)

The Challenge/Experiment

I recently underwent a super busy week. School, social life, event promoting, event planning, and a host of other time consuming activities left me feeling weak and in need of an energy boost. I decided to go to the store and purchase an energy drink. Little did I know, this menial trip would birth an experiment. As I stood in front of the cold drinks section at the CVS peering through the glass, I noticed there were tons of energy drinks to choose from. So many that it actually made me want to know which ones taste the best and have the greatest effects. I obviously wasn’t going to buy every type of energy drink there and taste them. So, I chose  to drink and compare the tastes and effects of various Starbucks, AMP, Monster, Red Bull, & 5 Hour Energy products. To be specific, I drank Starbucks Vanilla Doubleshot + Energy, Starbucks Espresso and Cream Doubleshot, Starbucks  Coffee Doubleshot + Energy, AMP Original Energy, Java Monster Vanilla Light, Monster Original Energy, Red Bull Original, 5 Hour Energy Extra Strength, and 5 Hour Energy Grape.

 

 

 

 

Java Monster Vanilla Light (Left) Starbucks Vanilla (DoubleShot+Energy Right)

 

 

 

The Disclaimer/Story

Before we go any further let me tell you that I did not drink all of them in succession on a single day or night.  I only drank them one to two at a time over the course of three to four days. And while most people may be curious to know what effect drinking up to five or six at one time would have on a person, I already discovered the results of that question. One day in class about a year ago, a student brought two big cases of Red Bull to class as a gift to the other students. Apparently she worked for Red Bull on their student marketing team and was able to get cases of the stuff for free.  Anyway, the combination of me being thirsty, a curious guy, and also extra tired from an assignment I ‘d stayed up working on the previous night, I decided to drink five Red Bulls within the span of about forty minutes. Big mistake! As I sat there in my chair watching my classmates give a presentation, I began to become jittery and uncomfortable. I started having pains in my chest and I even felt a little buzzed. After a while my heart felt like it was boosted into overdrive and at one point I actually got kind of scared. I felt like I’d ran a mile and was recovering from being out of breathe. I started picturing myself passed out on the floor. Needless to say, I was overwhelmed by all the taurine, caffeine and sugar flowing throughout my body. Lucky for me I didn’t pass out. Once the class ended I drank a lot of water and allowed the effects to wear off with time. So yeah, word of advice to anyone thinking about doing that. DON’T!!!!

 

 

 

Starbucks Coffee DoubleShot+Energy (Left) Starbucks DoubleShot Espresso & Cream

 

 

The Results

The only energy drinks that tasted good were the Starbucks Vanilla Doubleshot + Energy, the original AMP, and the original Monster. The rest of them were pretty gross. Yes, even the Red Bull. Gross! The winner of best tasting energy drink was the Starbucks Vanilla Doubleshot + Energy.  That stuff is delicious! That sweet taste of Vanilla coffee blended with guarana, ginseng and B vitamins is pure genius. First and second place runner up were AMP and Monster, which actually taste pretty similar to one another. Basically the original Mountain Dew on steroids. The winner of worst tasting energy drink tied between the Grape flavored 5 Hour Energy and the Java Monster Vanilla Light. Why someone would make such horrible tasting concoctions beats me. But hey, I guess their marketing teams were the victors in this situation because they got me curious enough to buy them. I definitely won’t be buying them again though. First and second runner up for worst tasting was the 5 Hour Energy Super Strength and the Red Bull. The tastes of those are indescribable and almost incomparable to any natural flavors known to man. All I can say is, a person who drinks those are clearly drinking them for their advertised energy inducing functions. Which, now that I think of, Red Bull really doesn’t give you wings. Those deceitful bastards! LoL The winner of most effective was the 5 Hour Energy Super Strength. I literally drank that stuff one minute and ten minutes later I felt like my pupils dilated, my senses multiplied and my attitude uplifted. In other words screw drugs, just drink a couple of those and you will feel like superman. Although the 5 Hour Energy Super Strength was the only energy drink that had a clear effect on me, that is not to say that the others didn’t. That’s just to say that their effects were not noticeable to me. After doing this experiment, I am tempted to do more food/beverage comparisons in the future and I invite you to try one yourself and let me know how it goes. ; )

Comments
  1. Holy crap I’m impressed that you were able to stomach all of these drinks without having to get your stomach pumped or the like. I recently had a redbull, and while it took the better part of an hour for me to feel even remotely awake, by the time 3am rolled around, I was in bed begging to sleep to come.

    Props to you, sir!

    Like

    • Arteest says:

      Yeah, that’s exactly how those things operate. You don’t feel any effects at first and then the effects sneak up on you, grab you and force you to be alert. lol

      Like

  2. jrittenberg says:

    So in conclusion, which drink do you think you will choose to use in the future? Also, which energy drink is the most or least healthy?

    Like

    • Arteest says:

      I would choose the Super Strength 5 hour energy if I want something that is really effective and I don’t mind disregarding taste. I would drink AMP or Starbucks vanilla if I want good taste. As far as health is concerned, they are all pretty bad for you. Caffeine and sugar and lets not forget high calorie content. It’s best to just drink Orange Juice or something for real.

      Like

  3. Samara says:

    You are completely right I forgot about 5 Hour Energy. I heard they are the best selling item at gas stations across America because truck drivers buy them all the time to stay awake.

    Like

  4. Patrick says:

    Good review and well timed might I add. I Think It would have been even more helpful if you had done a comparison on best value for us struggling students, and even described any side effects (if any) that the products had on you. All in all this was a good read.

    Like

    • Arteest says:

      thanks man. Yeah, I thought about the financial comparison, but I honestly didn’t even look at the prices too closely because I knew they were basically robbing me. Do not buy more than two energy drinks at one time. You will be angry once you realize how much money you have spent. lol

      Like

  5. Samara says:

    I would have to rank in order of effectiveness: Adderall, Red Bull, Monster then Amp. Taste award goes to Amp.

    Like

    • Arteest says:

      Red Bull doesn’t work for me. Never has. These energy drinks tend to have different effects on different people. As far as Adderall, I don’t think I’d use that. That’s a little bit much. But yeah, I still stick with the 5 Hour Energy as far as best results. If you haven’t tried it, you should and let me know what you think.

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